What Happens When Two People With STDs Hook Up?

Relationships are complicated enough without adding an STD to the equation. It’s not exactly the type of thing you can just include in your online dating profile—that is, unless you’re part of a growing number of people joining niche dating sites specifically geared toward people with STDs.

Case in point: Last year, more than 100,000 people signed up for the worldwide STD dating site Positive Singles, according to company data. And it’s no wonder the site is so popular: There are 20 million new incidences of STDs in the U.S. each year, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention—and that’s on top of the 110 million Americans who are already infected.

“STDs are so common that it’s hard to find a partner who hasn’t dealt with it before,” says Shari Brasner, MD, a gynecologist and assistant clinical professor at Mount Sinai School of Medicine in New York City.

Here’s the thing, though: Just because you and your partner have the same STD doesn’t mean it’s safe to have unprotected sex.

While direct re-exposure to an STD won’t always worsen your case, it could trigger flare-ups from a dormant infection like herpes, says Brasner. Plus, if your partner has been exposed to one STD, he’s more likely to have been exposed to others. And since many super-common STDs such as herpes, HPV, and Chlamydia can be asymptomatic, but still contagious, he may not even know if he’s a carrier, says Brasner.

The bottom line: You two love bugs may share the same love bugs—but you still have to use a condom. To further reduce your chance of transmitting STDs, avoid all sexual contact—kissing included—if either of you are experiencing symptoms or feel an outbreak coming on.

One final note: Condoms help minimize your risk, but they aren’t foolproof. “Because it doesn’t cover all skin surfaces, it’s an imperfect barrier,” says Brasner, “but it’s the best protection we have.”

photo: iStockphoto/Thinkstock

More from WH:
STD Facts You Should Know
6 Ways to Refresh Your Digital Dating Strategy
The Biggest Myths About Sex and Pregnancy

javahut healthy feed

What Happens If You Leave a Tampon In For Days?

Don’t you hate it when your ex spreads rumors about you? That’s what Snooki, the Jersey Shore star, is dealing with this week. Her former boyfriend attacked her hygiene on myex.com, a website devoted to trashing exes. The charming gentleman wrote that his reality TV star ex used to “[leave] the same tampon in for days!”

His claim is disturbing, and not just because it’s disgusting (and totally unsubstantiated) gossip meant to humiliate the Snookster. See, if it’s true, it’s just more evidence that you should never, ever do as Snooki does—because it could actually kill you.

Leaving a tampon in for days puts you at risk for getting toxic shock syndrome (TSS), an infection, similar to a staph infection, caused by the absorbent material found in sanitary products, says Laura Corio, MD, an OBGYN at Mount Sinai Medical Center in New York City. According to the Mayo Clinic, there are two ways super-absorbent tampons cause TSS: When they are left in place for a long time, they can become a breeding ground for bacteria. Additionally, the absorbent fibers can scratch the surface of the vagina, making it possible for bacteria or their toxins to enter the bloodstream.

“We’re not seeing as many cases [of TSS] as we used to because they’ve discontinued the super-absorbent tampons that primarily cause the issue,” Corio says. But it’s still something that happens to women occasionally, and can result in fever, drop in blood pressure, fluffing of the skin on the hands and feet, and, yes, even death.

Obviously, most women don’t elect to leave their tampons in for longer than the recommended 8 hours (because even without fear of death, it’s just gross). But it’s not unheard of—or even uncommon—for women to simply forget. “Anybody could forget,” Corio says. “You go to the ladies room and think to yourself, ‘I took out my tampon,’ only to find that’s not the case.” And, in other instances, you may even put another tampon in—forgetting you had one in to begin with—causing the original one to travel further inside you. Yikes.

Let’s say that happens: Don’t freak out entirely, because it won’t get lost in there. “The vagina is a closed system,” Corio says. “There is no where else it can go. It will never go into your abdomen.”

While comforting to know your tampon’s travels are local, how do you know it’s in there at all? You won’t be able to feel it, but oh, you’ll know. A wayward tampon will smell pretty terrible…pretty quickly. “The smell is so characteristic,” Corio says. “Most women come to the office with extremely smelly discharge, and we know almost right away that it’s from a tampon.”

And, yes, if you find yourself in this situation, you have to go to the doctor. “Most people try to get it out themselves, but it’s so wedged,” Corio says. “You should just schedule an appointment.” If you’re embarrassed, you shouldn’t be. “We see this every few months,” Corio says. “It’s actually pretty common.”

photo: Splash News

More from WH:
Get Fresh Tips for a Happy Vagina
Female Anatomy: Your Ultimate Guide
How to Prepare for Your Gyno Visit

Master mouthwatering recipes that fill you up and slim you down with Cook Yourself Sexy, the ultimate guide to a hotter, healthier, and more confident you.

javahut healthy feed