Does this fun infographic that’s been floating around the Web recently look familiar? It illustrates where the highest number of Missed Connections happen in each state, and according to a recent analysis by Psychology Today, the most common place where Missed Connections across the country occur is at Walmart stores.
Of course, you don’t have to post a Missed Connection on Craigslist to know that shoulda-woulda-coulda feeling: Everyone’s kicked themselves after missing the chance to chat with a cute guy at a bar or a coffee shop. So the next time you find yourself in the presence of a Ryan Gosling lookalike, use these tips:
Catch his eye
You’re in a bar full of ladies, but you want the hottie across the room to notice you. Try this: Just tilt your head down a bit and look up at him through your eyelashes. Guys find it more attractive and feminine, according to a study out of the University of Newcastle in Ourimbah, New South Wales, Australia. Simple enough! (Bonus points if you wear something red; research shows that the color really gets guys going.)
OK, he noticed you—now make him feel welcome
Once you’ve made eye contact, move on to the next step: Smile. There’s a reason this combo is the oldest trick in the book: Research proves it’s the best way to let a man know you’re interested, according to Craig Malkin, PhD, a psychologist at Harvard Medical School. It’s basically the universal “come hither” signal to guys. If you’re feeling extra bold, flip your hair and nod in his direction. The tip may seem obvious, but if you’re having an intense conversation about Downton Abbey with your girlfriends, you’re not doing it.
If all else fails, head over!
You smiled and batted your eyelashes, and he seems into it—but he isn’t budging. Go for it yourself, and keep your intro simple and direct. “Hi” could work. “Most people hate corny openers and jokes,” explains Malkin. “It’s really the straightforward approach that’s best.” But: Tweak your tactic based on location. When you’re at a bar, the understanding is that one of the reasons you’re there is to meet people, Malkin says, so the approach is easy enough. But striking up a conversation on the train to work? Sort of weird. In a space like that, Malkin suggests sitting down next to him and bringing up something you observe, like a headline on the newspaper he’s reading.
Got it? Go get ‘em!
More from Women’s Health:
How to Talk to a Man
Ask a Guy Out
Listen to His Body Language
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