Okay, okay. Turns out that bigger may actually be better. Sometimes.
Women who have frequent vaginal orgasms are more likely to say they have an easier time hitting the high notes with men who have longer penises, according to a recent study published in The Journal of Sexual Medicine.
Researchers asked 323 women (primarily university students in their 20s) to answer questions about their previous sexual encounters. Out of these, 160 had experienced vaginal-only orgasms and also had enough partners to compare size experiences, so researchers focused on this group for more analysis. They found that the participants who reported the highest number of vaginal Os were most likely to say that a longer penis was a better bet.
Which makes sense, if you think about it. “Women experience sexual stimulation, arousal, and orgasm in a wide spectrum of ways, so it would make sense that for women who enjoy vaginal stimulation (it’s their stimulation of choice), that they would really like large penises,” says certified sex therapist Gina Ogden, Ph.D., author of Women Who Love Sex. “The large penis not only stimulates the vaginal walls, but it can possibly stimulate the G spot.”
That said, no need to feel discouraged by a man who’s not so well-endowed. For starters, most women can’t achieve orgasm through vaginal penetration alone, so a big penis alone isn’t going to be sufficient for them. (Looking for a way to overcome orgasm obstacles? Conquer these five common detractors.) Plus, even if you are one of the lucky few who can climax from penetration alone, orgasm doesn’t necessarily equal satisfaction.
“My research says that what really satisfies women is the connection that they feel—if they feel noticed, cared for, if they feel loved, wanted,” says Ogden. “If women do not feel that connection, they may have an orgasm, but it may not satisfy them.” Besides, while large penises can be a “great pleasure,” they may also cause you pain if they bump up against your cervix, she says. (Is pain down there ruining your sex life? Use these tips to make sex less painful.)
So while a man with a larger penis might have a better chance at helping you reach the Big O (through vaginal stimulation alone), it still depends on the guy himself—and how he makes you feel, according to Ogden.
“Size isn’t everything,” says Ogden. “It’s about the heart. It’s about the heart-to-heart connection as well as the genitals.”
More from WH:
Is Facebook Ruining Your Sex Life?
The Weirdest Ways to Orgasm
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