Here’s something you probably won’t see on a candy heart: 85 percent of people think it’s important to have sex on Valentine’s Day, according to a new survey by GoodInBed.com. Call it a cliché, but the pressure is on to bring it in the bedroom this year. Here’s how to make the most of the holiday—whether you’re coupled up or not.
Rise to the Occasion
Those 85 percent of people aren’t wrong—V-Day sex can be great for your bond. “If you’re in a relationship and you’ve been in a little bit of a sex rut, I think a healthy sense of pressure is a good motivation,” says Ian Kerner, Ph.D., Founder of Good In Bed and author of She Comes First. “Don’t just avoid that challenge and expectation completely.” Instead, let yourself get excited about the chance to get intimate with your guy. Even if you’ve never been a fan of scheduled sex, let him know that it is definitely on the agenda for the night by sending him a sexy text early in the day.
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Get a Little Kinky
This holiday may seem sweet on paper, but most couples are actually hoping to get a little scandalous. 55 percent of survey respondents said they would be willing to try something new sexually to celebrate (wouldn’t St. Valentine be proud?). “Just like Halloween is an excuse to get into a sexy costume, this is an opportunity to be sexier in your relationship and try something adventurous,” says Kerner. His suggestions: Pick up a new sex toy, act out your fantasies, or experiment by watching porn together.
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Ditch Unrealistic Expectations
Unless you’re a contestant on The Bachelor, your date probably won’t involve a candlelit dinner at dusk followed by a romantic night in a luxurious hotel suite. And that’s perfectly fine. “Think about sex and intimacy as the centerpiece of Valentine’s Day, not the big expensive meal,” says Kerner. Plus, there’s nothing sexy about a crowded bistro on one of the busiest nights of the year. Instead, focus your efforts on making little romantic tweaks that will make your night way better. “Turn the bedroom into a love nest, get fresh cut flowers, clear out the digital devices and bring in the erotica,” says Kerner.
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Don’t Cave Under the Pressure
Whether you’re in a not-so-great relationship, tempted to call an ex, or diving into your online dating archives, remember that this is just one day, says Kerner. According to his survey, almost 50 percent of respondents said they felt pressure to have V-Day sex, and 40 percent of singles said they would consider having a hookup just because it’s Valentine’s Day. That might be a great short-term plan, but you risk waking up with one hell of an emotional hangover. Just don’t do anything you wouldn’t normally do on the other 364 days of the year. “Go out with your friends and check out Valentine’s Day events at bookstores and galleries,” says Kerner. “There’s usually free champagne to be had!”
RELATED: Why Isn’t Random Hooking Up Scary Anymore?
More from Women’s Health:
Have a Happier Valentine’s Day
Valentine’s Day Gifts You’ll Love
Have Better Sex This Winter
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