What to Do When a Friend Is Bringing You Down

Colds aren’t the only think you have to worry about catching from the people you see regularly: Negative thinking—a risk factor for depression—might be contagious, according to a new study published in the journal Clinical Psychological Science.

When something bad happens, people deal with the stress differently, says Gerald Haeffel, PhD, the lead study author and an associate professor of psychology at the University of Notre Dame. People who have something called a cognitive vulnerability make negative interpretations of it; so, for example, they might take events like losing their job or breaking up with their boyfriend as a sign that they’re a failure or that they have a not-so-bright future ahead.

Researchers wanted to test the idea that one person’s cognitive vulnerability could rub off on someone else, so they studied 103 randomly assigned freshmen roommate pairs at the University of Notre Dame. Their hypothesis was right: Freshmen with more depression-prone roommates were more likely to start thinking negatively themselves after living together for three months. And after six months, the freshmen who had caught the bug had almost double the level of depressive symptoms as those who didn’t show an increase in cognitive vulnerability.

Yikes, right? We can all probably think of a friend who’s a bit of a Debbie Downer, but still totally loveable. Here’s how to stay close with Debbie—without letting all of her gloom rub off on you:

Plan activities
Just because you want to spend time with your friend does not mean you have to meet her for happy hour and listen to her complain about a problem—again. “She might be in a rut, ruminating and saying the same things over and over and over,” says Irene S. Levine, PhD, psychologist, friendship expert, and author of Best Friends Forever: Surviving a Breakup with Your Best Friend. “So she might benefit from a bit of diversion.” Levine suggests distracting her with an activity—going for a run or heading to the movies—which also gives you an out from an hours-long conversation in which you act as a therapist. Plus, The Great Gatsby is out soon, and really now: Who doesn’t have fun staring at Leo for a few hours?

Go to someone else for guidance
We have our can-make-a-joke-out-of-anything friends, our style-savvy friends, our will-dance-all-night friends, and our advice-dolling friends. A girl who gives uber-negative feedback should not fall into the last category. Just because she’s coming to you to talk through issues does not mean the street has to run both ways. Rely on other pals when you’re stressed out and need suggestions, says Haeffel.

Take a break if you need to
“We choose our friends because they are satisfying and they help our health and well-being,” says Levine. So check in with yourself. If the friendship is taking a toll on you or your mental health, consider making some changes. “You may have to see less of the person, see them in small doses, or see them in a group setting,” says Levine. Put your mental health first and—bonus—if you’re in a better frame of mind, you’ll also be a better friend for it.

photo: iStockphoto/Thinkstock

More from Women’s Health:
6 Ways to Strengthen Your Friendships
How to Forgive a Friend
Best Friends Forever?

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Get This: THIS Plate Helps You Eat Less at Buffets

Check out the list of links that should be on your radar today:

There’s finally an antidote to buffet bloat: Choosing a smaller dish and doing a lap before filling up your plate can help you eat less, finds a new study. [HealthDay]

Rumor has it that Channing Tatum and Joseph Gordon-Levitt might do a movie version of Guys and Dolls together. We’d so watch that. [Vulture]

Vitamin E may help heal ex-smokers’ hearts, according to recent research. [TIME]

Is your guy sleep-deprived? It could affect his fertility. [Medical Daily]

If you want to win people over, the sound of your voice may matter more than what you say. It’s not fair, but you might as well use the info to your advantage. [WSJ]

Homemade meals aren’t automatically healthier: A new study finds that the vast majority of recipes from celebrity chefs fall short of healthy eating recommendations. [NBC]

Side butt is now trendy. Any clothing that prevents people from wearing panties is not something we want to wear—or see other people wear. [The Cut]

B.S. alert: Wikipedia has moved all of the women from its “American novelists” page to a new “American women novelists” page—while men got to stay put. [Salon]

In the ongoing debate about whether chocolate contributes to acne, a new study finds that the sweet stuff might trigger breakouts. So that means it would probably be a bad idea to drown your sorrows in a Hershey bar… [Huffington Post]

photo: iStockphoto/Thinkstock

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6 Awesome Kettlebell Workouts

If you lift weights to tone your muscles and hit the treadmill to work your heart, you’re wasting your time—there’s a workout that does both: Kettlebell training builds strength and improves aerobic capacity, according to a new study conducted by University of Wisconsin La Crosse’s Department of Exercise and Sport Science.

In the eight-week study, people who did hour-long kettlebell workouts twice a week increased their aerobic capacity by almost 14 percent. They also boosted their abdominal core strength by 70 percent and significantly improved their dynamic balance.

While running still trumps kettlebell training in the cardio department, researchers say kettlebell training beats other aerobic activities like walking or cycling.

Convinced that you want to try kettlebells, but not sure what to do with them? These will help you get started:

8 Total Body Kettlebell Exercises

4 Advanced Kettlebell Moves

Super-Quick Kettlebell Workout

A Full-Body Workout To Go: Print It!

Sculpt a Sexy Core in 15-Minutes

Watch: The Killer Kettlebell Workout

photo: iStockphoto/Thinkstock

More from WH:
Master the Kettlebell Swing
Which is Better: Cardio or Strength Training?
Gym Equipment for a Kick-Ass Home Workout

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Why You Need to Have More Sex

When it comes to sex, the more, the merrier—no really: People are happier when they’re having more sex, according to recent research out of the University of Colorado Boulder.

To reach that conclusion, lead researcher Tim Wadsworth, PhD, an associate professor of sociology at the University of Colorado Boulder, looked at data from the national and biennial General Social Survey. He analyzed responses from 15,386 people who were surveyed about their happiness levels and sexual frequency. The findings: As that frequency increased, so did the respondents’ happiness levels. (Sounds about right!) There is a catch, though: When Wadsworth examined respondents’ sexual frequency in comparison to that of the people in their peer groups, he found that people who were having less sex than their peers reported being less happy.

That’s consistent with previous research on social comparison and income, says Wadsworth: “If I had a lot of income but there was nobody else around me, there’s no marker for me to know whether I’m rich or poor,” he says—and the same principle applies to sex: “If other people are having more sex than you are, it makes your own sex life feel less satisfying.”

The takeaway: Regardless of how much you (or your girlfriends) are getting it on right now, you’ll be happier if you spend more time in the bedroom. These tips will help you make the most of it:

Make Time for Sex 

Mind-Blowing Sex Tips

The Best Time to Have Sex

Have Better Orgasms

Better Sex Positions: Twists That Will Make You Shout 

Same Guy, Better Sex 

 

photo: Eyecandy Images/Thinkstock

More from Women’s Health:
Have Great Morning Sex
Couples vs. Friends with Benefits: Who Has More Sex?
Are You “Normal” About Sex?

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Does the Jumpstart to Skinny Diet Work?

If you’ve got three weeks, you have enough time to get your body in show-off shape—at least as far as Biggest Loser trainer Bob Harper is concerned. Earlier this week, Harper’s new book,  Jumpstart to Skinny, hit shelves—and it promises amazingly fast results. We’re talking 20 pounds in 21 days type results.

Of course, you have to follow some pretty stringent rules to drop so much weight so quickly. All of your meals must be 40 percent carbohydrates, 40 percent protein, and 20 percent fat—and you can only take in 800 calories a day. What’s more, complex carbohydrates are only allowed at breakfast, and you also have to do 15-20 minutes of the “jumpstart” exercises listed in the book five days a week, in addition 45 minutes of daily cardio.

The good news is that Harper allows for unlimited vegetables, and they don’t count toward the daily calorie allotment. When Harper appeared on the TODAY Show on Monday morning to promote his book, he emphasized that this is a short-term strategy only meant for when you need to drop pounds fast.

So will Harper’s plan get you slim in time for summer? And is it even safe?

“Eating 800 calories per day for three weeks isn’t going to ‘hurt’ you,” says Mike Roussell, PhD, founder of Naked Nutrition and head of nutritional services at Peak Performance gym in New York City. “You won’t develop any vitamin or mineral deficiencies in that time.” Caroline Apovian, MD, Director of Nutrition and Weight Management Clinic at Boston Medical Center and author of The Overnight Diet agrees.

But while this plan is safe, it may not be as effective as possible. The calorie deficit tells your body to lose weight, but having such a high percentage of your calories come from carbs causes you to produce insulin, which makes your body hold onto fat. “It is like driving with your foot on the gas and the brake at the same time,” says Roussell, who recommends limiting carbs to 20 percent of your calories. Some of the remaining 20 percent that Harper suggested should go to carbyohydrates would actually be better spent on protein and fat, says Roussell.

Yes, fat. A woman following Harper’s recommendations would be eating just 17 grams of fat per day. To put that in perspective, one egg alone has six grams of fat. Research conducted by the Women’s Health Initiative indicates that it’s incredibly difficult to stick with such low-fat diets. “You’ve got to be more liberal with fat to make a diet doable without being hungry,” says Apovian.

In his book, Harper says that his 40/40/20 plan helps prevent the cycle of weight loss and gain—but experts disagree. “There’s nothing in the literature to support this,” says Apovia. Any time you cut back on calories so drastically, you make yourself more prone to yo-yo dieting, says Roussell. “Despite eating lots of vegetables on this plan, you’ll still be hungry,” he says. As a result, you’ll likely head straight for high-fat foods once you get off of Harper’s diet—and regain any weight you lose.

Jumpstart to Skinny may not be perfect, but it does have some useful takeaways:

Veg out
You might not want to OD on vegetables (they still contain calories after all), but Roussell recommends consuming veggies at every meal—preferably green ones. “You’re not going to get fat eating broccoli or apples,” he says, “but you might fill yourself up on that broccoli.”

Power up with protein
Making sure that 40 percent of your calories come from protein will help keep your body fueled and set you up to lose weight. A high-protein diet, plus exercise, helps build body mass—which is the best way to boost metabolism, says Apovian.

Change your carbs
Swap refined carbohydrates for whole grains, fruits, and vegetables, says Apovian. They have more nutrients and fewer calories—win-win!

Don’t forget fitness
Harper’s plan has dieters engaging in daily exercise throughout the entire three-week period—a smart move considering that focusing on diet and exercise simultaneously yields greater weight loss results than adding fitness to a preestablished diet routine, according to recent research from Stanford University School of Medicine.

photo: iStockphoto/Thinkstock

More From Women’s Health:
Protein-Packed Recipes for Weight Loss
Weight Loss Success Stories
13 Ways to Stay Motivated to Slim Down

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6 Awesome Benefits of Birth Control

You already know that birth control offers ridiculously reliable protection against unplanned pregnancies—assuming you’re using it correctly, that is. But BC actually has a lot of other amazing social and lifestyle benefits, too. Researchers at the family planning organization the Guttmacher Institute recently crunched the numbers, finding that women who regularly use contraception tend to have more years of education under their belt and greater economic stability—and they also form romantic partnerships that are more solid when compared to women who aren’t contraception-covered. The best part is, these aren’t the only perks. Check out some of little-known health benefits of birth control, particularly the hormonal kind.

It can cut your odds of some cancers
Women who go on the pill, ring, or other combined estrogen-progestin methods for 15 years slash their lifetime risk of developing ovarian and endometrial cancers by approximately 50 percent, according to a 2010 study. The thinking here is that hormonal BC blocks ovulation and evens out natural hormone imbalances, leading to less exposure to potentially damaging hormones, says Christine Proudfit, MD, an assistant professor in the department of obstetrics and gynecology at NYU Langone Medical Center in New York City. One caveat: Some research suggests that taking oral contraceptives may slightly increase your risk of breast and cervical cancer, so you’ll want to talk to your doctor about whether hormonal birth control is right for you if you have a family history of either disease.

It smoothes out your skin
Combination contraception lowers your body’s levels of testosterone, which all women make in small amounts. That spells good news for your skin since the hormone is the culprit behind acne breakouts and excess body hair growth, says Proudfit.

It shields you from an energy-crushing condition
Women who suffer from heavy periods lose excess blood every month, and that can lead to anemia—a condition characterized by fatigue and weakness. Going on hormonal birth control makes periods shorter and lighter, so you lose less blood and aren’t robbed of your stamina, says Proudfit.

It wards off a fertility-threatening infection
Although many people fear that staying on birth control for too long will negatively affect their baby-making abilities, the opposite is actually true. Pelvic Inflammatory Disease is a serious infection of the reproductive tract that, if left untreated, can compromise your fertility. The progestin in hormonal birth control makes cervical mucus thicker, says Proudfit, and research suggests that this forms a roadblock that prevents PID-causing microbes from entering your system.

It protects you from migraines
Hormonal ups and downs just before and during menstruation leave many women debilitated by killer migraine headaches. Hormonal contraception, including progestin-only pills, can ease or even stop these cyclical skull-throbbers, says Proudfit.

It can stabilize and even boost your mood
Changes in estrogen and progesterone levels during the days before your period can make you wigged out, irritable, and even depressed. Hormonal contraception steadies those fluctuations, so you feel like yourself all month long. As for the happiness boost, this comes from the peace of mind you get by knowing your body is baby-proofed. Couples who experience an unplanned bundle of joy are more apt to feel anxious and depressed, according to the Guttmacher report.

photo: iStockphoto/Thinkstock

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Get This: A Shar-Pei Pup Needed a “Face-Lift”

Check out the list of links that should be on your radar today:

One case of plastic surgery we can totally get behind: a two-year-old Shar-Pei puppy had a “face-lift” so that he could see, smell, and breath better. [ABC]

Not sure what’s more amazing—how much fun Lena Dunham looks like she was having at the Time 100 last night, or this GIF of her dancing with Christina Aguilera. [The Cut]

People across the U.S. have opened their wallets to help the Boston Marathon victims. [The Atlantic Wire]

Someone in Taiwan has contracted the first case of the new bird flu identified outside of China. [NPR]

Just in time for grilling season, an unfortunate new report finds that ground beef and chicken are the meats most likely to land you in the hospital. [AP]

People across the country wasted $ 418 billion dollars on prescription drugs last year. That’s almost half a trillion… [Medical Daily]

Mattell has retired the American Girls you know and love in favor of boring and usually upper-middle-class characters. We miss you, Samantha, Kirsten, and Molly. [The Atlantic]

This might be the most ridiculous (and hilarious) picture of Justin Bieber yet. [Vulture]

We may not have seen the last of former congressman Anthony Weiner’s sexy selfies: He’s copped to sexting “with multiple people.” [Daily Intelligencer]

photo: iStockphoto/Thinkstock

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Why Are Women So Much More Exhausted Than Men?

Getting a good night’s sleep and waking up rested might just be one of the best feelings in the world. But—bummer alert—women may be less likely than men to regularly experience that refreshed feeling. New information released from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention shows that women aged 18 to 44 are almost twice as likely as men in the same age group to frequently feel very tired or exhausted.

In survey data collected by the U.S. Census Bureau in 2010 and 2011, 15.7 percent of women below the age of 45 said they felt “very tired” or “exhausted” on “most days” or “every day”—compared to just 8.7 percent of men. That means dudes are almost twice as likely to be well rested.

That data doesn’t surprise sleep expert Lisa Shives, MD, who says women are up to twice as likely to report having insomnia. Shives posits that, since many women now work outside of the home and take on a big portion of chores and family duties, it makes sense that women would say they feel wiped out.

But just because it’s super common for women to feel tired doesn’t mean you should ignore it. If you don’t get enough sleep, you increase your risk of health issues like depression, high blood pressure, cancer, diabetes, weight gain, and more, says Shives, who is the founder of Northshore Sleep Medicine in Evanston, Ill., and the medical expert for SleepBetter.org.

“People treat sleep like it’s a recreational activity, like they can cut back on it,” says Shives. “Sleep is not negotiable.” Read more about why it’s so important to get your ZZZs—and how you can clock more:

Easy Ways to Get More Sleep

Find Out How to Sleep Better

Get More Sleep: 10 Sleep Myths Busted

Sleep Much? The Effects of Sleep Deprivation on Your Body and Mind

Yoga for Bedtime

15 Tricks to Sleep Better

Do THIS, Sleep Better Tonight

Sleep Before You’re Dead

Sleep Solutions: Finding the Right Pillow

Need Sleep? Products to Help You Get More Sleep

How Your Diet Affects Your Sleep

9 Ways to Sleep Better Tonight

photo: Wavebreak Media/Thinkstock

More from Women’s Health:
How to Sleep with a Man (and Actually Sleep)
The Secret to Better Sleep
Comfortable Sleep for Two

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Sugary Sodas Increase Diabetes Risk—Even In Small Amounts

In case you’re still on the fence about quitting your soda habit, consider this: Drinking just one sugar-sweetened soft drink a day can drastically increase your odds of developing type 2 diabetes, according to a new study published in the journal Diabetologia.

Researchers from Imperial College in London analyzed data from the European Prospective Investigation into Cancer and Nutrition (EPIC), which identified participants with type 2 diabetes and also included how much juices, nectars, sugar-sweetened soft drinks, and artificially sweetened soft drinks people in eight countries in Europe consumed. Of all the beverages examined, the sugar-sweetened sodas wreaked the most havoc:  For each additional 12-ounces participants consumed per day, they boosted their risk of developing type 2 diabetes by another 22 percent.

Scary stuff, especially given that about eight percent of the population in the U.S.—around 25.8 million children and adults—already has diabetes. So stop dragging your feet and forget the fizzy drinks already! Or if you’ve already gone soda-free, forward this article to a friend or family member who isn’t to encourage them to follow in your footsteps.

Photo: Hemera/Thinkstock

More from WH:
Do You Have Prediabetes?
15 Celebs with Diabetes
12 Ways to Diabetes-Proof Your Life

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7 Ways to Protect Yourself From Cancer

If there were a way to prevent cancer, you’d definitely try it, right? Turns out, there are plenty of ways to reduce your risk of developing the disease, which affects 1.6 million new Americans every year. The thing is, many people just don’t use them.

Researchers estimate that lifestyle factors—like smoking, eating poorly, not getting enough exercise, and being overweight—will contribute to nearly a third of the new cancer cases expected in 2013, according to an annual report recently released by the American Cancer Society (ACS). In other words, healthier choices could keep as many as 553,000 people cancer-free this year.

Changing your behavior sounds pretty simple compared to, say, finding a cure for cancer. And yet, Americans continue to make poor health decisions year after year.

“We pick up these behaviors during our younger years, when we aren’t really thinking about the consequences,” says Suzanne O’Neill, PhD, assistant professor and health psychologist at the Lombardi Comprehensive Cancer Center at Georgetown University. “It’s difficult to connect them with outcomes that may or may not happen decades from now. And it’s easy to convince yourself that you can quit later.”

Worse yet, a lot of unhealthy behaviors–like smoking a cigarette or lying out in the sun—provide immediate rewards that reinforce the bad habit, says O’Neill. But healthy behaviors don’t always feel as great right away.

It might not be easy to end unhealthy tendencies, but it’s certainly worth the effort. Make these lifestyle tweaks ASAP to cut your cancer risk:

Stop smoking
Researchers estimate that 174,100 people will die from cancers related to smoking in 2013. If you currently light up, quit as soon as possible, suggests Vilma Cokkinides, PhD, strategic director of risk factors and screening for the American Cancer Society. The earlier you nix the habit, the longer you’ll live, she says. And don’t worry about ballooning as soon as you quit. Here’s how to stomp out the habit without gaining weight.

Manage your weight—starting NOW
Weight is a factor in as many as 20 percent of cancer-related deaths, according to ACS report. Of course, shedding pounds is easier said than done. Find out what your healthy weight is, then take action with these weight loss tips that don’t suck.

Wear SPF 15 or higher every day
It’s also a good idea to wear sun-protective clothing when you’re outside for extended periods of time—especially in the summer, says Cokkinides. And of course, never, ever visit a tanning salon. Thirty-three states now regulate the indoor tanning industry, and with good reason: Skin cancer is almost a sure thing for people who fake bake and burn, according to a 2010 University of Minnesota study. Find the best sunscreen for your skin type.

Cut way back on processed foods
Cokkinides suggests eating like your life depends on it because, well, it does. The fewer processed foods and fatty meats you consume, the less likely you’ll be to develop cancer. Load up on plants and lean proteins instead. You can get started with these seven ways to sneak more produce into your diet.

Move more
While researchers don’t know exactly how much exercise is necessary to ward off cancer, they recommend shooting for 150 minutes of hard-core exercise per week, or up to 300 minutes of moderate-intensity movement. Physical activity can reduce your risk of breast, colon, endometrial, and prostate cancer—and help fend off weight-related cancers, too, according to the ACS report.

Get the HPV vaccine
If you’re 26 or younger (the age until which the HPV vaccine has been proven effective), ask your doc about getting this. Since HPV contributes to 70 percent of cervical cancer cases, according to the ACS report, taking this step to protect yourself is a no-brainer.

Get regular health screenings
Unfortunately, even the healthiest lifestyle won’t make you totally immune to cancer. Early detection helps people maximize their odds of survival. The thing is, between breast exams, skin exams, pap smears, STD tests, mammograms, and colonoscopies, it can be hard to stay on top of the screenings you need. Bookmark this fool-proof guide to remember what needs to be checked when.

photo: iStockphoto/Thinkstock

More from WH:
The Checklist That Slashes Your Cancer Risk
The Skin Cancer Fighter in Your Medicine Cabinet Now
How to Help a Friend With Cancer

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